Somedays You Feel Lost...........

better

Mon, 14 Aug 2006 17:44:36 GMT

dci was freaking awesome!!!! i had a great time with him this weekend, and i think everything makes sense to me now. :)

i'm going back to school on saturday, so the packing begins now.... well not technically.

woot

Wed, 02 Aug 2006 23:44:46 GMT

all is going well at camp, and i will update later. however i better be getting home before it starts pouring like crazy... the lights are flickering here at the library.

i am very excited for next weekend because i am going to see drum international with alex in madison. he comes home early next week... oh i can't wait.

question from camp: can inspiration to resume my old goal of being a doctor come from a camper breaking her wrist?

guess i better let you guys know i am still alive

Thu, 27 Jul 2006 00:15:04 GMT

hmmm... here is a brief update about my summer.

1. i finally got a cell phone!!!!!
2. alex is alive and well in israel...thank g-d. 2 more weeks and he will be home :)
3. going to see TRAIN with Marc was fucking awesome!!!
4. hanging out with amanda and julia at the taste was awesome as well :)
5. interesting things are happening at work... somethings are pissing me off, and other things are just plain interesting...but i guess that is how it is at all jobs
6. tomorrow is thanksgiving at work... best lunch of the summer tomorrow (catered meal from a restaurant... turkey, mashed potatoes, cranberries, etc. :).
7. today was halloween at work... the kids were soooooooo cute in their costumes.
8. my co-workers and i are trying to find a song that we can teach our kids to dance to. if you have any suggestions of an APPROPRIATE song... feel free to leave it in the comment box.
9.um yeah... that's about it

Warning: This Entry May Have Strong Political Themes

Thu, 13 Jul 2006 21:55:19 GMT

The situation in Israel worries me so much. I am very much pro-Israel rights, but I am also pro-Palestinian rights. I think both parties have rights to the land, but they have the right to live in peace along side each other. Israel gave up the Gaza Strip several years ago to let Palestinian have their own land to form a viable society along side Israel. Instead of the Palestinian using the land to create their own country with a growing economy, they used the land in militant ways. When Shalit was captured at a checkpoint near Gaza Strip, it was by Militants on Israeli land. Shalit wasn't in Gaza Strip; he was on his own turf when he was captured. Militants in the Gaza Strip have also been firing rockets into nearby Israeli towns. I think the act of the militants abducting Shalit was the straw that broke the camel's back.

I feel that for once Israel wants to deal with the terrorists once and for all. In the past Israel has negotiated and has released Palestinian prisoners in exchange for peace. However, I don't think Israel wanted to release prisoners this time around, because released prisoners may become the next militants.

Israel and the Jewish people have a right to exist. We have a right to live without the fear of being persecuted for our beliefs. We have the right to live in Israel and be free; but we also have the right to live without the fear of being blown up by a suicide bomber at an Israeli restaurant, discothèque, or shopping mall.

Palestinians have the right to exist as well and live in Israel, however they must renounce terrorism in order for there to be peace in the Middle East. They have the right to be free, but they do not have the right to blow themselves up and take many innocent lives with them.

I can't even begin to say how nervous I am that an all out war is going to happen between Israel and terrorist forces. It concerns me greatly that Iran or Syria may join in on the conflict between Israel, the Palestinian in the Gaza Strip, and Lebanon. It concerns me even more that Iran may have nuclear weapons that they would use against Israel.

Right now Alex and my cousin are both in Israel on a tour. I am so worried about the safety of my best friend and I just keep praying that this situation will be resolved quickly. I worry that if the conflict escalates then the airport will shut down, and they will be stranded in Israel until the conflict resolves. I am praying for the safety of Israeli civilians and soldiers fighting for their rights. I am praying that this conflict ends soon, the soldiers come home, and then they can try to resume peace talks.

However, with the way things are, praying can only do so much.

~~~~

Here is an editorial from a Jewish Newspaper for further insight:

Saving Corporal Shalit
By Joseph Aaron

This is a tough one. A really, really tough one.

One that raises all kinds of questions, really, really important questions.

It was a couple of weeks ago that a 19 year old Israeli soldier by the name of Gilad Shalit was kidnapped by Hamas militants.

As a result, Israel has unleashed a powerful barrage of military might, having its troops reenter Gaza, arrest a significant number of Hamas ministers, bomb bridges and other infrastructure in Gaza and more.

Now, on the one hand, all that is understandable, even admirable. Israel clearly values human life, clearly is willing to do anything, everything to rescue one soldier.

There is something very beautiful about that. In Judaism, a life is the whole world. Beyond that, those who wear the uniform of Israel know that they will never be abandoned. That's an important and powerful message for those who serve in the Israeli army. And that's an important and powerful message for the enemies of Israel.

But I believe the taking of Corporal Shalit calls for some serious soul searching, for us to rise above simple answers, for us not to be intimidated by all the armchair warriors who come out at a time like this and urge the Israeli army to do anything to save this beautiful, young boy.

It's easy to say this is a no-brainer, that a soldier is missing and all must be done to save him. Yes, all must be done, but not necessarily everything.

One of the saddest developments in Judaism today is the fear that grips so many. Judaism is founded on a belief in asking questions, in examining issues, in being unafraid to explore and think things through, in not just settling for the convenient answer or the politically correct way.

Today, we are all scared. Scared because too many are so quick to call Jews with whom they differ the most ugly of names, to question their Jewish patriotism, their very Jewishness. Are so quick to call those who question, an Arab lover or a self- hating Jew or a naive fool or worse.

And so, I am well aware of the danger of even raising the question of whether how Israel is handling the Shalit matter is the best way, the most Jewish way.

But I do so because that is the exact purpose of an independent Jewish newspaper, the mission of those few of us still left who are truly independent and who believe real journalism is vital to the health of a community.

The truth is that how to handle the taking of Gilad Shalit is not an easy question to answer. But it is an important question to ask.

I frankly find myself uncomfortable with what Israel is doing and no, it's not because I'm a bleeding heart, pro peace process liberal.

Fact is, that I'm disgusted with the Palestinians. They keep talking about how the occupation so hinders them, how much they deserve to do their own thing. Well, the sainted Ariel Sharon gave them that chance when he gave them total control over Gaza.

Did they use their first chance at running their own place to start building hotels and apartment buildings, to provide jobs, an infrastructure, a good life for their people? No, they used it to send missiles into Israel and to kidnap an Israeli soldier.

So, no, my unease about all this has nothing to do with the Palestinians. And everything to do with the Israelis.

For starters, my unease stems from the fact that how this is being handled is not as Israel historically has handled such matters.

Yes, Israel has always valued all of its citizens and done all it could to rescue them. But Israel also always considered those taken hostage as "soldiers," whether or not they wore a uniform.

Meaning, they were to understand that while, yes, Israel would do all it could to save them, it would not do things the Jewish state simply could not do; would not, could not, harm the country to save one person.

That was how Israel always operated and all those who lived there understood that. Israel has had a wise policy, from day one, of not negotiating with terrorists, understanding that to do so only invites further terrorism. And so, every Israeli understood that if taken hostage, they must consider themselves, they were considered by their government, to be soldiers in a war.

I don't know when that changed, why that changed, but it seems to have changed in the case of Corporal Shalit.

I think that's dangerous and not only because of Israeli history but Jewish tradition. While Judaism values human life above all else, the Talmud also teaches that a Jewish community must choose to sacrifice a Jewish life in the short run if, in the long run, not doing so would cost more Jewish lives. Meaning you don't do anything to save one Jew now if doing so will endanger more later.

One gets the sense that that is what is happening now. It is the first rule of handling such things that you do not do what Israel is doing, namely make the hostage so valuable to you that it emboldens the kidnappers.

By taking the overwhelming actions it has, Israel has told Hamas that this soldier is a very, very valuable commodity. And that tells them to hold onto him as long as they can, for the price will only go up, they will be able to get more and more.

Beyond that, it is important to remember a couple of things. One is that attention is the lifeblood of the Palestinians. Their most powerful weapon is being noticed, is being center stage on the world stage, being in the newspapers and on TV.

By devoting the entire attention of the prime minister and the defense minister and the Israeli military to saving Corporal Shalit, Israel has said to the militants holding him that the longer you do, the more it will stay in the headlines, the more you get to determine how we act, what we do.

It is also important to remember that this whole thing is being orchestrated by Hamas leaders in Syria. Meaning those who are totally unaffected by any Israeli bombing of Gaza. No skin off their nose. Indeed, it just makes them more powerful, shows they, not the Hamas prime minister in Gaza, is really calling the shots. Why would they want to give that up?

Sometimes, the wisest course is to set your own agenda, not let it be set by your enemy. And yet I fear what is happening is that Israel is dancing to Hamas' tune. Hamas kidnaps a soldier and Israel makes like nothing is more important than getting him back.

As I say, on one level, that is beautiful. On another, that is a luxury a sovereign government that must protect all five and a half million of its citizens simply cannot afford.

Has all the bombing of Gaza done anything to hasten Shalit's release? I have my doubts. For the fact is that most Palestinians see every day they take the Israeli bombing as a mini- victory. Fact is that taking it only hardens their resolve. Fact is they like to feel they have Israel on a string, getting it to do all kinds of things to get back its soldier. Because Israel has responded as it has, Palestinians feel powerful and they're likely to want to hang on to that feeling.

Israel clearly did not give a moment's thought to what was in the best interest of Israel in terms of responding to the kidnapping. It reacted immediately and has been reacting ever since.

What concerns me about that is it feels that Prime Minister Olmert is being primarily motivated by two things. One is to show how tough he is, something always dangerous. Two is to use the Shalit kidnapping as a means of destroying the Hamas government, also not a good idea.

Olmert is a new prime minister. He follows in the footsteps of military giant Ariel Sharon. Olmert has no military background whatsoever. His defense minister, Amir Peretz, has no military background whatsoever. And so you have two guys who want to show they are tough, even when toughness may not be called for, even when toughness may, indeed, be counterproductive.

Beyond that, Israel should have learned by now that you can't choose your enemy's government. Israel has tried to do that over and over, always with disastrous results. And yet, it looks as if the kidnapping gave them the excuse to try to militarily destroy Hamas, which is an impossibility.

Finally, what concerns me about how Israel is handling this is that bombing Gaza day after day after day, destroying bridges and houses and all the rest, all for one soldier, is bound to eat away at Israel's soul. No matter how good the reason, it does something to a country to do that. One day, it was Israeli friendly fire that killed an Israeli soldier. The next, it was a bomb gone awry that killed three Palestinian teens.

Israel is already a place lacking in civility, where there is so much coarseness in life, that adding more coarseness, endangers the very fabric of the society.

I applaud how much Israel cares about Gilad Shalit. And I certainly favor doing all it can to win his release. He is the best of us, a 19-year old doing his duty, a beautiful neshama with a father and mother back home who are enduring hell every moment he is being held.

But Israel must act in a truly wise way, must think and then do what is truly best in terms of hastening his rescue and not just acting for the sake of acting. And it must remember that while yes, saving the life of this Jew is of paramount importance, the only thing more important, what must come first, is ensuring the lives and souls of all Israelis and of Israel's future.

My guess, by the way, is that Corporal Shalit would completely agree with that. May G-d protect him.

wtf mate?

Tue, 27 Jun 2006 20:44:15 GMT

If you were an asteroid, which country would you hit?

Australia.

Now where are the kangaroos going to live?!

Click Here to Take This Quiz
Brought to you by YouThink.com quizzes and personality tests.

Woot

Mon, 05 Jun 2006 18:24:28 GMT

In two days I will no longer be classified as a teenager, i will finally be 20! Wow... it is really hard to believe that I have lived a fifth of my life, and most of it has been occupied with school.

Hmmm... other than that not much is really going on. My brother's graduation party was yesterday. I had fun cooking, and hanging out with my brother and his friends. Nothing is better than playing wiffle ball, playing 4 square, and playing playground games when you are college/post college age!

Work doesn't start until the 12th... so I have lots of free time to do absolutely nothing! So far I have been studying for physics, as I really want to test out of the class. I should probably also review basic biology, since I will be a bio UTA next semester.

Well, I hope everyone is enjoying their summer break.....

If you are interested in hanging out sometime this week feel free to give me a call.....

Wake me up because I must be dreaming!

Wed, 17 May 2006 18:34:23 GMT

Quick update because I have to get back home to take care of my grandma:

I PASSED ORGANIC CHEMISTRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I NEVER HAVE BEEN SO HAPPY TO GET A C IN MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

that is all folks....

quiz!

Thu, 27 Apr 2006 13:38:35 GMT

What animal would best suit your personality?

A PENGUIN.

You are the penguin. You take life in its stride, not letting the big issues of the world stand in your way. You like spending time with large groups of friends and you are considered a bit of a socialite jumping back and forth between different groups of friends. However, you still have time for your family and remain close to them.

Click Here to Take This Quiz
Brought to you by YouThink.com quizzes and personality tests.

Tasty Cedric!

Sat, 22 Apr 2006 04:23:13 GMT

You scored as Cedric Diggory. If you went to Hogwart you would be the lucky girl fucking Cedric Diggory! Congratulations! Popular, good looking, and a hell of an athlete. All he had to do was look at you and you were on your bakck! MMMMM I bet that sex is golden!
too bad he dies...
o well, enjoy that fine peice of man while he lasts..
go ahead girl, go head get down...

</td>

Cedric Diggory

60%

Harry Potter

40%

Fred and George Weasley

40%

Percy Weasley

40%

Victor Krum

40%

Ron Weasley

35%

No one, your a prude

35%

Draco Malfoy

25%

WHO ARE YOU SCREWING AT HOGWARTS??
created with QuizFarm.com

And when I feel like I'm lost something tells me you're here with me

Mon, 03 Apr 2006 04:04:32 GMT

This entry is a two part entry, for those of you who aren't my lj friend this is the only post you are going to get. Sorry to disappoint, but that is the way it is. If you are my lj friend, don't read the rest cause it will be redundant.

It's been a while since I have updated bloggy, but a lot has happened. First, my computer was infested with goodness knows how many viruses, trojans, and spy-ware; as a result I was unable to use my computer for a week (it took resnet a week to get someone here and fix her). Thankfully, my computer is healthy again, and working perfectly fine (and thankfully I didn't loose my files!!).

Here's a brief update of what has happened in the past few weeks:

1). I applied to be a supervisor at a camp this summer, unfortunately I did not get the job (eh, I still will be working as a counselor at camp anyways)

2). Hillel played Ultimate Capture the Flag on the quad. It was a lot of fun getting all muddy and sprinting from one side of the quad to the other.

3). My toe decided to have sympathy pains for my infected computer, and is infected itself (yeah, i know it's gross... but it is soooo much better now!)

4). I went home this weekend and had an awesome time!

5). I saw an awesome storm, and possible funnel formation of a tornado

6). I typed this blog.

Well, that is all I am going to post in public format.... See you all on the flip side!

i hate trojans

Fri, 24 Mar 2006 21:29:09 GMT

sorry for the lack of posting.... my computer is very sick, and i am waiting for help from tech zone! thankfully, kelly is letting me use her comp until mine is fixed... here is a quiz until i have time to update

Advanced Global Personality Test Results

Extraversion	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	43%
Stability	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	63%
Orderliness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	56%
Accommodation	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	56%
Interdependence	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	63%
Intellectual	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	56%
Mystical	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	43%
Artistic	\|\|\|\|\|\|	30%
Religious	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	56%
Hedonism	\|\|\|\|	16%
Materialism	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	50%
Narcissism	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	63%
Adventurousness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	36%
Work ethic	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	63%
Self absorbed	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	43%
Conflict seeking	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	36%
Need to dominate	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	36%

Romantic	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	36%
Avoidant	\|\|\|\|\|\|	30%
Anti-authority	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	50%
Wealth	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	36%
Dependency	\|\|\|\|\|\|	30%
Change averse	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	36%
Cautiousness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	43%
Individuality	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	43%
Sexuality	\|\|\|\|\|\|	30%
Peter pan complex	\|\|\|\|\|\|	30%
Physical security	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	76%
Physical Fitness	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	77%
Histrionic	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	43%
Paranoia	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	43%
Vanity	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	43%
Hypersensitivity	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	43%
Female cliche	\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|\|	50%

Take Free Advanced Global Personality Test
personality tests by similarminds.com

thanks jack for the quiz

Tue, 14 Mar 2006 20:58:34 GMT

the Asserter
Test finished!

you chose AY - your Enneagram type is EIGHT.

"I must be strong"

Asserters are direct, self-reliant, self-confident, and protective.

How to Get Along with Me

Stand up for yourself... and me.
Be confident, strong, and direct.
Don't gossip about me or betray my trust.
Be vulnerable and share your feelings. See and acknowledge my tender, vulnerable side.
Give me space to be alone.
Acknowledge the contributions I make, but don't flatter me.
I often speak in an assertive way. Don't automatically assume it's a personal attack.
When I scream, curse, and stomp around, try to remember that's just the way I am.

What I Like About Being a Eight

being independent and self-reliant
being able to take charge and meet challenges head on
being courageous, straightforward, and honest
getting all the enjoyment I can out of life
supporting, empowering, and protecting those close to me
upholding just causes

What's Hard About Being a Eight

overwhelming people with my bluntness; scaring them away when I don't intend to
being restless and impatient with others' incompetence
sticking my neck out for people and receiving no appreciation for it
never forgetting injuries or injustices
putting too much pressure on myself
getting high blood pressure when people don't obey the rules or when things don't go right

Eights as Children Often

are independent; have an inner strength and a fighting spirit
are sometimes loners
seize control so they won't be controlled
fugure out others' weaknesses
attack verbally or physically when provoked
take charge in the family because they perceive themselves as the strongest, or grow up in difficult or abusive surroundings

Eights as Parents

are often loyal, caring, involved, and devoted
are sometimes overprotective
can be demanding, controlling, and rigid

Renee Baron & Elizabeth Wagele

The Enneagram Made Easy
Discover the 9 Types of People
HarperSanFrancisco, 1994, 161 pages

You liked the test? so please RATE it...
but remember! it had only two questions!!! ;-)

You are not completely happy with the result?!
You chose AY

Would you rather have chosen:

BY (FOUR)

CY (SIX)

AX (SEVEN)

AZ (THREE)

My test tracked 2 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:

You scored higher than 69% on ABC

You scored higher than 58% on XYZ

Link: The Quick and Painless ENNEAGRAM Test written by felk on Ok Cupid, home of the 32-Type Dating Test

happy pi day!

Another quick update:

Tue, 14 Mar 2006 20:49:49 GMT

Things that I have done so far over break:

1. Hang out with him
2. Go to the hs's band concert and hear him play
3. Go through stuff that used to be in my room, and get teary over things that I loved when I was younger
4. Destroy my diary from 7th grade
5. Bake hamantaschen for Purim
6. Go to Purim services with my mom
7. Type this journal entry....

yeah, break is going well.....

Quick Update

Sat, 11 Mar 2006 02:39:14 GMT

Hey all, I'm home....

I got the best wake up call this morning; he called me at 8AM and had something to tell me, but totally forgot when he was talking to me. he was the last person who called me last night, and the first person to talk to me in the morning...hehehe!

He definitely seems excited that I am home, and we have plans for tomorrow night,,,,

Biggest surprise of all: my mom finally had my room painted!!!!!!! instead of it being a sunshine yellow box, it is now a pale blue!!! I have a ceiling fan, and a hanging mirror!!! The greatest thing is that most of my things from when I was younger have now been removed from my room, and are awaiting sorting into three piles: keep (for sentimental value), sell in a garage sale, and donations....

All my old stuff is going to be my project this break..

I have even more exciting news!! For some strange reason I ended up at the library (my mom needed to check something on a computer), and I was looking at GRE and MCAT books and in the MCAT book I found the most useful thing of all!! Spectroscopy explained in simple english!!!! HALLELUJAH!! I might actually do well on the spectroscopy exam thanks to the MCAT book.... maybe I should go to med school after all!

Well I am officially, on stimulus and excitement overload.... time for me to go home and read an MCAT book! WHEEEE!

I can't wait till tomorrow!

1 more week

Mon, 06 Mar 2006 05:17:33 GMT

Well, the week of hell is coming up and I feel incredibly unprepared. This is probably because all I wanted to do this weekend was relax and read "The Da Vinci Code". Ugh, good books are my nemesis.

Hmm... not too much is new. I had a delicious dinner prepared by Joanna....yummy steak and salmon!!

This week had to be my record of times I talked to him...a phone call and two im convo's. I can't wait to go home and see him....

I am really bored and don't want to do hw... i think this is going to come back and haunt me..

oh well

Yeah, life throws you curves. But you learned to swerve.....

Thu, 16 Feb 2006 21:27:09 GMT

These past few days have been really odd. I miss him very much, and I am trying to find a way to finally say something. I sent him a cute valentine's e-card complete with a penguin (he did agree it was cute, and that it was a good pick for him), and in return he sent me a humorous card of a screaming banshee on a date.

Hmm... classes are going well, and organic chemistry is a lot harder than i expected. Well, it's more like the tests are going to be harder than what I expected. I don't think I want to know how terrible I did on our first exam!!! As time ran out I was just putting anything down on the sheet of paper in case he gives "pitty points" for trying.

Foundations of health edu is an awesome class, and the professor thinks that I am extremely talented by the work I have handed in. This class is going to be the confidence booster I need!

I decided to join Eta Sigma Gamma, which is the health ed honors fraternity (co-ed). I think that I will get a lot of valuable experience from this activity.

Well, I am off to a meeting with Dr. Otton from the CDC. I am super excited that I will get to talk to someone from a place that I would be uber excited to work for.

my weekend

Mon, 13 Feb 2006 05:09:26 GMT

I had an amazing weekend home!!! Friday night was a little hectic because Kelly and I ran into traffic while coming in through the city. The play he and I were to see was at 8, and by the time I got home it was already 6:30. Soon after Kelly and I arrived home, he was already waiting to take me (we had to be at the Shakespeare theatre by 7:30). So I basically changed and got myself to look presentable in less than 5 minutes. He bought me chipotle for dinner, which I was very thankful for! We managed to get to the theatre with a little time to spare, and after he got our tickets, we talked about everything that has happened in the past month. He seemed very happy that I came home, and was definitely happy to be home. The play (much ado nothing) we saw was amazing, and very funny. Once again, Shakespeare theatre did not disappoint me.

Saturday night I went out again with him and some of his friends to an Indian restaurant. When I ordered my food, I asked for it to be extra mild. However, the food was still incredibly spicy for me. I was very thankful that he was helping me talk to the other people. He told them the start of my funny college stories, and had me continue them. This definitely helped me talk, because otherwise I would have been too shy to talk to anyone except him.

The food was really good, but i could barely eat it because of the spice. i enjoyed eating the roti, and the bite of his pistachio ice cream he fed me.

After we ate dinner, we drove to baker's square for pie. Strangely, I wasn't hungry, and i barely ate anything.

After we ate pie, we went to one of the girl's house to play apples to apples. The funny thing was that he and I had some weird esp thing going on, because we kept picking each other's cards when we were the judges. I had some really amazing cards: cactus, batman, duct tape, science fiction, festering wound, terrorist attacks, etc. It was a very funny game!

It was very hard to say goodbye to him Saturday night. I gave him a big hug and I didn't want to let go. i stood in the driveway and watched his headlights fade away, and I felt so cold.

Saying goodbye to him is getting harder and harder. I called him from the car on my way to Kelly’s house, and it was very hard to say goodbye. I thanked him for a great weekend, told him how great it was to see him, and reminded him to call once in a while. He agreed that it was great to see me, and that he was looking forward to seeing me when I next come in.

As we approached Kelly’s hometown, I knew that it was time to say goodbye. Yet again this was another weekend where I didn't tell him how I really feel. I didn't tell him that I miss him when we are 174 miles apart. I didn't tell him how much I care about him, how much I like him.

Ugh... I wish I could just tell him everything, but I can't even begin to formulate the words.

My biggest concern is that everything will turn out wrong, and I will not only be hurt, but no longer have my best friend. To me, he is my world and my everything. When I am without him, I feel empty and cold. I don't know how I could deal with him gone from my life permanently.

Sigh... I need to find the courage and strength to finally say something. Until then, I can't stop missing and thinking about him....

3 days....

Wed, 08 Feb 2006 23:24:17 GMT

Queen: You're My Best Friend

"Ooo. you make me live
whatever this world can give to me
It's you, you're all I see
Ooo, you make me live now honey
Ooo, you make me live

You're the best friend
that I ever had
I've been with you such a long time
You're my sunshine
And I want you to know
That my feelings are true
I really love you
You're my best friend

Ooo, you make me live

I've been wandering round
But I still come back to you
In rain or shine
You've stood by me girl
I'm happy, happy at home
You're my best friend.

You're the first one
When things turn out bad
You know I'll never be lonely
You're my only one
And I love
The things that you do
You're my best friend

Ooo, you make me live.

I'm happy, happy at home
You're my best friend
You're my best friend
Ooo, you make me live
You, you're my best friend."

:)

You shook me all night long.....

Tue, 07 Feb 2006 21:18:36 GMT

Life is definitely picking up again, and I have so much going on.... I reluctantly agreed to be Hillel Vice President while Mike is on leave. This is going to make my Tuesday's insane: I have band until 6, and then will have to go straight to the executive board meeting, and then wait till 7:30 for the regular meeting.

I still have to decide if I want to rush Eta Sigma Gamma, the Health Sciences honor co-ed fraternity. This will be another somewhat time consuming activity, but it would look really good on my resume. ETG also has really awesome opportunities to participate in. As time passes, I am starting to be more and more convinced to rush.

I called him last night to let him know that I am coming home. I could have sworn he said, hold on and let me talk to your in-laws. If I did hear him right, whoa! So, my Friday is going to be hectic because as soon as I get home, he is picking me up to go to dinner with friends. He invited me to go to dinner with some of his friends before going to the show. We are supposed to have Nepalese food; which is something I have never tried before.

I can't wait to go home and see him!!!

Why are there certain words that are so hard to say?

Sat, 04 Feb 2006 23:17:43 GMT

I just called him, and I can't even begin to say how wonderful it is to talk to him. I miss him so much, and I just want to be home and be able to talk to him face to face. I want to be near him sharing stories of college, and listen to him tell me stories about what is going on in his life. Talking to him makes me want to be home even more.

Maybe that is why I avoid talking to him on the phone; the more I hear his voice the more I want to be home.

I can't even begin to describe how it was wonderful that I know I am accepted by his family. When I called his mom talked to me and asked me how school was, and wanted to know the next time I am coming home because she can't wait to see me. His dad even said hi to me too.

If I come home next weekend, he and I are going to see "Much Ado About Nothing" at Chicago Shakespeare Theatre....which is much incentive to go home!

ugh I want to go home soooooooooo bad and see him..... hopefully i can!

First few weeks back....

Sun, 29 Jan 2006 22:55:19 GMT

Well, I have been at school now for a few weeks, and I am back to my normal sleep schedule. I like my classes so far, and organic chemistry definitely is going to be a lot of work. I really like cell bio, and our professor reminds me of my high school AP BIO teacher. I also really like my foundations of health education professor and class. So far I am certain that I made the right decision in declaring a community health education minor. One of the first assignments we had to do was create a picture of our definition of health. I had a basic idea of what I wanted to do for the project: draw a human body and then fill it in with pictures of healthy things. Since I have no drawing ability, I asked Amanda if she could draw the body for me. Amanda didn't draw just any body; she drew Da Vinci's Virteuan Man. So for my first project, I had a kick ass collage thanks to Amanda!! My internet HSC class is really easy, and I think it helps a lot that I took AP enviro sci in hs.

Ok... going to make short news briefs now, since I really need to get things done today:

1. I miss him
2. Everything is really confusing to me emotion wise, and I am fighting with myself to make the right decision. This time I am going to listen to my heart, and use it as my guide. I can't think too much about this, and I need to listen to what my heart wants.
3. I miss Israel, and am worried about the safety and security of Israel when Hamas has a part in the Palestinian government.
4. I am going to be co-president of Hillel next year, and now am in training for my job
5. Books cost me over $400 this semester, so now I am working more hours in order to make me feel more comfortable about how ridiculously expensive my books were and how little money I will be getting back for them.
6. I had a girl on my floor cut my hair, and it looks awesome!
7. I am going to get a female betta and name her Eurydice, which is Orpheus' love (I currently have a male betta named Orpheus).
8. I am volunteering again at the humane society, and have met some very adorable dogs and kittens. I just hope all of them get a good home! I also have met a dog that was a transfer from Mississippi, and an orphan from Hurricane Katrina.

That's about it for now.... I will update later when I have more time....

Sabbaba!

Sun, 22 Jan 2006 18:06:25 GMT

Israel was the most amazing 10 days of my life, and I met 45 amazing people who made the trip so memorable! Israel made me realize a lot of things, and after going there I have never felt so much pride about being Jewish. When I was in Israel, it was almost as if my soul knew it was home, and I felt so happy! I also challenged myself to do things I would never have thought I would do; I rappelled down a mountain!!! I mean I cried my way down the 200 feet, but I did it. I hiked up a crater that had to be at least a 100 foot ascend; I hiked 300 ft up Masada at 4 AM. I know that I wouldn't have been able to do any of these things without the support and cheerleading from the other people on my trip. I won't forget them cheering for me to rappel down Maktesh Ramon, I won't forget Nate pushing me to the top of Masada, even when I was out of breath and my legs were killing me.

Being in Israel also made me realize how Israel and the freedom we are fighting for is so important. I have never felt so free in my life and I am around people who understand. We had a discussion night about anti-Semitism, and the Israeli teens that were with us on the trip never experienced any anti-Semitism. I felt like they were the luckiest people around, because I have met many people who are Anti-Semitic, or do not respect me or my views because I do not believe in the same thing as them.

I loved Israel, I miss the 45 people that made the trip special, and I can't wait to go back. Even though I would not move to Israel anytime soon, I will definitely visit! Maybe I'll emigrate when I am old an grey, and need a good place to retire.

Missing everyone like whoa, CH55: Go Jew Go, Achiem Achiem Achiem Achiem Simcha Simcha Simcha Simcha, Ode Yavoh Shalom Aleniu, Chi Chi Chi Le Le Le Viva Chile!

Jet Lag sucks

Wed, 18 Jan 2006 03:33:58 GMT

I'm back from israel... will talk about it later. check out pics on facebook! lylah tov!

You scored as Biology. You should be a Biology major! You are passionate about the sciences, and you enjoy studying cell growth and evolutionary concepts which enable living organisms to survive. Pursue that!

</td>

Biology

83%

Psychology

75%

Chemistry

67%

Sociology

58%

English

50%

Anthropology

50%

Mathematics

42%

Dance

42%

Philosophy

42%

Journalism

42%

Linguistics

42%

Theater

33%

Engineering

33%

Art

25%

What is your Perfect Major? (PLEASE RATE ME!!<3)
created with QuizFarm.com

In the name of Boredem

Thu, 29 Dec 2005 22:00:42 GMT

TEN: FIRSTS

First Friend: Beth
First best friend: Beth
First Screen Name: same one I have now actually
First Pet: a goldfish named goldie (how original)
First Piercing: ears
First Crush: a boy in 4th grade
First CD: hmmm... i have way too many to know this!!
First Car: i drive my mom's camry
First Boyfriend: jr year of high school... i am such a nerd!
First Girlfriend: n/a
First Job: lab assistant in my high school

NINE: LASTS

Last Beverage: water
Last Car ride: going to the store with my mom two nights ago
Last Movie Seen: Ghost Ship (take my advice and don't watch it at 10PM at night!!!!)
Last phone Call: Amanda
Last Cd Played: Goo Goo Dolls
Last time you Cried: it's been a while
Last thing you ate: pretzel
Last bad thing you did: uh... not sure, cursing?

EIGHT HAVE-I-EVERS

Have you ever dated one of your best friends:
Have you ever skinny dipped: no...
Have you ever been on tv: yes
Have you ever kissed someone: yes
Have you ever cheated: no
Have you ever said i love you: yes
Have you ever been in love: yes
Have you ever broke up with someone: yes

SEVEN THINGS I AM WEARING RIGHT NOW

1. blue sweater
2. jeans
3. hiking boots (i have to break them in before going to Israel)
4. socks
5. down jacket
6. nothing else for you to know about
7.

SIX THINGS I'VE DONE TODAY

1. read a book

2. watched tv

3. talked on the phone

4. helped my mom clean

5. walked to the library

6. walked to walgreens to get my mom a chanukah card

FIVE FAVORITE THINGS IN NO ORDER

1. biology/diseases/science

2. him

3. school

4. Hillel people

5. yeah i can say my mom

FOUR PEOPLE I CAN TELL ALMOST ANYTHING TO

1. Alex

2. Mike from Hillel

3. mom

4. Kelly

THREE CHOICES

1. Black or White: depends

2. Hot or Cold: warm

3. Chocolate or Vanilla: usually vanilla, but sometimes chocolate

TWO THINGS I WANT TO DO BEFORE I DIE

1. be successful in life, love, and work

2. change the way humanity thinks about their health

ONE THING I REGRET

1. Giving up on myself in high school

~~~~~~~

HE IS COMING HOME TONIGHT!!!!! heheheheh! hopefully i will get to see him tonight :)

Wheee!

Thu, 29 Dec 2005 00:37:07 GMT

1 week till ISRAEL!!!!! Very excited about that, and he comes home tomorrow!!! Friday I'm possibly going downtown with friends from school.

I'm really excited about starting classes next semester, and I kinda am ready to go back to school.

Well I have to get going! Hope everyone is enjoying break and the holidays! Happy New Year!

Name 5 of life's simple pleasures that you like most, then pick 5 people to do the same. Try to be original and creative and not to use things that someone else has already used.

~ Running, swimming, or doing anything active
~ I have to agree with Amanda and say finishing a project, or doing well in school
~ Hanging out with my best-friend in the world
~ Spending time with my family
~ Cooking anything from scratch

Most of my friends who have ljs did this already so.... your turn Jack!